Hi – it’s been a rough few months and while I do need to catch up on the blog, I also have some other priorities right now.
My grandmother passed away on the 3rd of November. We thought we had at least the next few Christmases left with her, but she fell a few months ago and we did our best but she never quite could get back on her feet. I think the work was too hard, in physical therapy, and the struggle to get up and eat. We had a few beautiful weeks with her at home, and then she let go. It seemed like she was at peace.
Since she fell, until today, I haven’t had any motivation to do anything but work and sleep. It was a traumatizing experience, helping the woman who took me to ice skating lessons try to walk to the bathroom on a Saturday morning.
But she’s at peace now. We’re planning the funeral, and working on a new schedule – not to care for Gram and get her back and forth from her bed from her wheelchair, but for Gramp, who is alone for the first time since they met, in the 50’s, and devastated.
My father has asked for some space from the lamentation, as he has his own. He’ll come home for the funeral. He is inconsolable, in his own words. This is tragic for myself, and my sister, but this is calamitous for him. He was an only child. And he didn’t always treat Gram the best. None of us treated her the way she deserved, except maybe Gramp. We could tell because up until she couldn’t even speak, she didn’t forget him.
I have still been getting all my beauty products and have taken my small joys in trying them out and continued doing my makeup, but it’s hard not to see everything through the new lense of grief that I’ll be working through for the winter. My skin has also not been the best. I picked a lot the first few weeks, and I expect I’ll do the same for the next few weeks now that it’s over. So I need to keep up with everything.
I don’t have pictures or swatches or much to say about the last few boxes I received, but I’ll make up for it this month when I do my ICON box review. I added on a few things, about $75 worth on top of the $55 that I already pay. So it’s a lot – but it’s okay. I work a lot of OT. And I’d do anything to stay okay.
I cried my eyes out last night as I was going to bed. I took a melatonin and slept for 12 hours. Then called my sister. My grandfather is sending me photos to print on photo paper at work I’m glad I work at a print shop. I can print everything we need.
I tried to make my November ICON Box a better skincare/makeup mix so hopefully I got that right. I plan to get that next box typed up and reviewed on time so that I can get back on track. Writing these posts and updates is a good exercise and puts my purchases to a constructive use – not that doing makeup in and of itself isn’t productive, but still. It’s a little different to get content about it published, get the photos taken, the lighting, the editing, the cropping, etc.
I will also be posting a “2023 Recap” post as well, which will be a little bit of fall favorites and then a general overview of the discoveries of the year.
So that’s the plan! Thanks for reading and I’ll post again very soon.
~Dani